Epiphany, p.23
Epiphany, page 23
“I’m not hungry.” My stomach flopped at the thought.
Without another word, he steered the car back onto the highway. The road disappeared underneath us, and I practically heard the wheels in his head spinning from where I sat. He took the next exit and pulled into a Burger King drive-thru.
“You haven’t eaten much today. You’ve gotta be hungry,” he said.
“I’m not hungry.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
“Just order your food.” I winced at my short tone. “I’ll think about it.”
The idea of unloading on someone was tempting. Heat flooded my cheeks at the thought of telling him the entire truth. No way could I tell my ex that I’d slept with my brother.
“That smells disgusting,” I complained, cracking my window and allowing the crisp air in. “I’ll never figure out how you can eat and drive without wearing at least half of it.”
He greeted me with a boyish grin. “What can I say? I’m the shit.” When he failed to get a response from me, he added, “Okay, Mac. What’s going on? Lay it on me. You’ll feel better.”
“Thomas Hill wasn’t my father.” The words escaped and hung in the air.
He wadded up the burger wrapper and tossed it in the bag. “What do you mean?”
“My mom lied to me.”
“Oh, man.” His shocked, blue-eyed gaze met mine. “So that’s the reason for this trip?”
I nodded. “I met my…my father.”
He raised a brow. “And it didn’t go well?”
“No.” I gnawed on my lower lip and watched as Tacoma sped by.
“What did he tell you? Did he deny it?”
“No.” I leaned against my window and closed my eyes, concentrating only on the hum of the road. Hamilton had known about my ability. A simple touch and he’d known. I still couldn’t grasp it, and I didn’t want to think about what it meant.
Joe fell silent. I wasn’t sure if he was giving me space to process, or if he didn’t know what else to say, but conversation was non-existent after that. I was too upset to let sleep take me so I gladly took over the wheel in Portland. He immediately fell asleep in the passenger seat, and the quiet wasn’t so disturbing with his soft snores filling the air.
All I could think of was Aidan. Nausea hit me, becoming more intense the closer we got to Watcher’s Point. I mentally rehearsed what I’d say and tried to think of the right words to use. Nothing sounded right. How would I ever face him again once he knew the truth? I’d have to tell him everything and leave Watcher’s Point permanently. Move on. Never look back.
As the thought percolated through my head, I glanced into the rearview mirror at the blinding headlights following too closely. “What is up with this idiot?” I let out a curse and stepped on the gas, but the car kept pace.
“What’s going on?” Joe asked, stirring in his seat.
“This guy won’t get off my tail.”
He sat up straight and cranked his neck to see. “Where are we?”
“About ten miles outside of Watcher’s Point.”
“I’d slow down just to piss him off.”
I laughed. “I know you would. I’ve lost count of how many tailgaters you’ve driven mad.” The car behind us swerved into the oncoming lane and sped past, and only then did I realize a cop had been tailing us.
“Unbelievable!” Joe exclaimed. “That’s exactly why I don’t like cops. They think they own the road.”
We reached my apartment a few minutes after midnight. “Thanks for tagging along,” I said wryly, thinking of how he’d wormed his way into my car. Part of me was glad he’d come. The drive would have been long and lonely without someone along for the ride.
Joe gave me a funny look when I failed to shut off the ignition. “You’re going to see him, aren’t you?”
I nodded.
“I’ll follow you in my car.”
“No.” Absolutely not. No way did I want him knowing where Aidan lived. He was being much too pushy as it was. “I’ll be fine.”
“You can’t go by yourself, Mac.”
“Well that’s the beauty of us no longer being together—you don’t get a say in what I do. Go home.”
“Why do you have to be so stubborn?”
I inhaled and counted to ten. “His place isn’t far. I just need a few minutes alone.”
His expression softened, and I knew he was going to relent. “Are you sure?” he asked.
“Yeah.”
“Fine,” he said as he opened the door, “but I’m calling you in a few minutes to make sure you get there okay. You better answer.”
“I will. Tell my mom I’m okay, will you?”
“Sure, but we’re not done. I’ll talk to you soon.”
I waited until he backed down the driveway before calling Aidan, but he didn’t answer. A chill went through me, and suddenly, I couldn’t wait to see him.
As I drove toward HWY 101, I realized how weird being alone was. Other than last night, the majority of which I’d spent in my apartment alternating between crying and scrubbing away the black grime, this was the first time in weeks I’d had to myself.
Bright, colorful lights flashed in the rearview mirror. I checked my speed, but going five over the limit didn’t normally catch the police’s radar. Just my luck. I’d probably caught the attention of a cop who needed to fill his quota.
I let off the accelerator and steered the car onto the shoulder. Fog drifted on the highway, and the lights atop the patrol car turned the scene into a misty kaleidoscope of color. My cell phone vibrated on the console, the display lighting the darkness with its soft glow. I switched off the ignition and answered the call.
“I just got pulled over. I’ll have to call you back.”
“Speeding to get to lover boy, huh?” Joe let out a derisive laugh, and I knew he was using sarcasm to hide his hurt.
The officer approached the driver’s side, his flashlight bouncing with his steps. “I’ve gotta go. I’ll call you when I get there.”
I raised my gaze to the window, but the beam blinded me. The window shattered before anything else registered. A scream tore from my throat, and the last thing I remembered was Joe’s frantic voice in my ear as the pain in my head pulled me under.
45. Being Conscious is Overrated
I awoke in murky stages, the first being a nauseating sense of movement. The second was the realization that something was wrong. Horribly wrong. The third was the clearest and the most horrifying. My wrists were tied together as were my ankles.
I pulled at the bindings, and a low groan vibrated in my throat. Despite the persistent throb at my temples, I focused on the misty recollections; the wafting fog on the highway, the beam of a flashlight, the splintering sound of glass.
Forcing my eyes open, I met total blackness. My cheek rested against the floor of what I assumed was a van, and a putrid smell burned my nose, an odorous mixture of mildew and bleach. The van bounced over uneven ground, and I held my breath, my ribs hitting the floor hard with each lurch.
What the heck happened?
The floodgates opened, and the memory of flashing lights hit me like a cold fist.
A cop…oh my God.
My heart beat out of control as I tried to remember more, but I drew a blank. There was only Joe’s voice in my ear. Or had I imagined that? No. I remembered answering the phone, remembered a blinding light and an explosion of pain in my head…then nothing.
“Don’t panic,” I chanted in a whisper as I tested the rope. Come on! I slid my wrists back and forth, and the knot loosened the slightest bit as the van came to a violent stop. The engine shut off, and I didn’t dare move or make a peep. A door creaked open before slamming with an echo. I ceased to breathe as footfalls drew closer, crunching on gravel with each step. I counted them.
One, two, three, four, five…
Keys jingled from the other side, and the handle squeaked and turned. The van dipped, and instantly, I knew who entered behind me. I wished I could see him, but I was lying on my stomach, completely vulnerable.
“Where am I?” It wasn’t the question I wanted to ask—the one I could barely think of.
What are you going to do to me?
My body went rigid as he came near. He rolled me to my back with rough hands, and his silhouette loomed large, a dark shadow blocking the light of the waning moon. He shifted, causing the moon’s beam to glint off the cigarette lighter in his hand.
“No…” My plea came out a squeak, an ineffectual cry for mercy. I was only an object to him, something to torture and kill for his perverse pleasure.
I squeezed my eyes shut and yanked at the rope, ignoring the pain biting into my wrists. Hysteria wouldn’t help my situation, so I held it in. In fact, from what I knew of the Hangman, my cries and pleas would only heighten his pleasure…his arousal. Vomit burned in my throat, accompanying the rancid taste of fear, but I forced my eyes open anyway.
He sparked the lighter to life, and the flame illuminated his face. Malevolent eyes peered at me, two expressionless voids holding no remorse for what he’d done to all of those other women.
For what he was about to do to me.
His expression distorted into something unrecognizable, and it took a few seconds to realize who towered over me. I couldn’t comprehend what I was seeing.
Judd McFayden. The sheriff’s son.
“Why?” My voice broke on the question, but he didn’t answer. A tear slid down my cheek as acceptance nicked at my composure. I wasn’t getting out of this. Aidan would find my body—just like we’d found Six. Just like he’d found his wife. I didn’t know how I knew, but I did. Judd would dangle my death in front of him like a trophy. A muffled sob escaped. Not panicking was impossible.
For all the times I’d witnessed the murders of other women in my dreams, I’d failed to see my own.
“Here’s what we’re gonna do,” he said, coming closer and letting the flame of his lighter lick my cheek. I shrank away with a whimper. “I’m gonna untie your feet and you’re gonna get out. And don’t even think about testing me.” He exited the van and released my ankles. “Get out slowly.”
Slow was the only speed I could go with my hands tied behind my back. My legs shook as I touched ground, and they buckled. Sharp rocks bit into my knees.
No. Don’t give up. Fight, dammit!
He wrenched me up by the hair, and I struck without thinking, digging my knee into his groin with as much force as I could manage. He let go, and as he spat a litany of obscenities, I ran for the trees, kicking up dust and rock in my wake. I heard him coming after me, his heavy steps pounding the earth. Thick fog blanketed the trees, and I prayed it would be enough to cover me. I tripped over a rock and tumbled to the ground.
“There’s nowhere to go, sweetheart!” he shouted.
Oh God…get up! Go, go, go!
No matter how fast I ran, it wasn’t fast enough. I struggled against the rope, trying to free my hands as I stumbled over rocks and tree roots. Hot tears blinded me, but I kept going, ignoring the twigs and branches that scratched my face.
The shoreline of the lake came into view. I skidded to a stop against a tree, unwilling to leave the cover of fog, and sucked in lungfuls of air. His footsteps were gone.
Don’t panic. Think! Need to find help.
I pulled at the rope again, but after several minutes of trying to get free without success, I went limp against the tree. That was when a small structure in the distance, maybe a quarter mile down the lake, beckoned me with a single porch light leading the way. I blinked several times to make sure I wasn’t seeing an apparition. Pushing away from the tree, I took off for it. Leaves crunched behind me, and I whirled, hoping to find glowing eyes, a burly bear; heck, I’d settle for a mountain lion at this point. Anything but him. A raccoon skittered from the brush and raced behind a tree.
I sucked in a breath…then had the air knocked from me as I hit the ground hard. Dirt entered my mouth as I fought against the hands grabbing me. I spit it out and screamed at the top of my lungs, hoping to get the attention of the occupants in that house. So close, but so far away.
He dug a knee into my spine, yanked my head back, and slipped a loop of thick rope around my neck. I retched into the dirt, and in that moment the only person I thought of was Aidan. My despair gushed down my cheeks in salty tracks. I tasted them on my tongue as Aidan’s face flashed behind tightly-closed lids.
“I’ve been waiting for this,” he said, his tone oddly normal, “much too long to let you get away.” He didn’t talk like a villain in a movie; there was no sinister undertone. He sounded no less menacing than the guy who bagged my groceries. “Just wasn’t counting on all the complications.”
“Why are you doing this?” Instinct took over, and I rolled and kicked, but all I managed to do was attack air.
He laughed. “I do enjoy the feisty ones.” He grabbed the rope and pulled, and I gagged as he hauled me along the water’s edge. He stopped long enough to push me into the lake with a muddy boot. I surfaced, sputtering water as I coughed.
“Get up,” he ordered. Before I could so much as move, he tugged me up by the other end of the noose. I swayed and blinked away the stars in my vision. “You can walk, or I can drag you the rest of the way. Makes no difference to me.” His expression contradicted his words. He relished the thought of a fight.
“I’ll walk,” I bit out through chattering teeth. He turned and yanked on the rope, and I stumbled behind him on shaky legs.
This is it.
The closer we got to the van, the closer I faced my death. I stalled when we reached the clearing. He tugged on the rope and propelled me across the gravel driveway, and I realized how isolated the location was. Trees cordoned off the area from the outside world, and through the thicket, I spotted a sliver of the glimmering lake.
We approached a small cabin, and I panicked all over again. Not only did I recognize it from my dreams, but I knew with certainty that I’d never get out of there alive. I’d rather he strangle me now. He stopped to open the door, and I struck with my feet—the only means of self-defense he’d left me.
His fist connected with my cheek bone. “You stupid bitches never learn.” He forced me inside, kicking and screaming the whole way, and the rope became a vise around my throat. I struggled for air as bright light flooded the cabin. I recognized the rustic architecture from my dreams—dreams that were worthless in hindsight. They hadn’t saved Six, and they weren’t going to save me now.
He dragged me to a bedroom where I fell to my knees. “Get your ass on the bed.”
“No,” I choked out. I’d fight him with everything I had.
He jerked me up and pushed me to the mattress. I screamed again, squirming and kicking until something sparked and buzzed from the corner of my eye. Intense pain pulsed through every nerve in my body, and I howled in agony, louder than I thought possible until I couldn’t even do that anymore. Muscle spasms rendered me incapable of moving, of fighting him. He prodded me with the Taser again and again, and I was left disoriented and tied to the bed, spread-eagle and facedown after the last shock lanced through me.
He sodomized Six.
It was my only thought. I spewed bile onto the scratchy blanket against my cheek as the bed dipped under his weight.
“Don’t hurt me, Judd.” My voice sounded odd, as if a small child was the one doing the begging. I squeezed my eyes shut and cried into my vomit. Fabric ripped through the air, echoing in my ears. I bit into my lip and drew blood as he tore the last article of clothing from me.
“I’m going to do more than hurt you, sweetheart. Foreplay first.” He brushed latex-covered fingers down my spine.
My head spun with dizziness, and like the time I’d seen Aidan’s past, I now floated above a room I didn’t recognize, staring down at people I’d never seen.
Except…the little boy, maybe eight or nine years old, looked familiar. He cowered at the feet of a balding man. Risking a glance up, his eyes pooled with tears. I recognized him as a younger version of Judd.
“I’m sorry. I tried not to be bad.”
I gasped when the man backhanded him.
Rather than cry, the boy glared at him. “My daddy will kill you!”
“You’re daddy isn’t around, is he? Even he didn’t want you.” The man clenched his hands. “Who would want a sinful, nasty little boy?”
In a display of courage, the boy stood and hardened his gaze. “He’ll come back for me.”
His tormentor laughed. “Stupid kid. Your old man isn’t coming back, and your mom can’t help you either. Now repent for your sins.” He unbuttoned the front of his jeans, and I sobbed upon witnessing what happened next. The boy begged for his mother, and when she failed to come, he began to pray. I couldn’t stomach it. I crashed back into the present as Judd sparked a lighter to life.
“I’m sorry he did that to you.”
I felt him go still. “What are you talking about?”
“You were just a boy.” My voice cracked, and even though he had me bound and was about to kill me, a part of me hurt for the younger version of him…the little boy who had no one to rescue him. “I saw what happened to you as a child.”
The flame went out. “You what?”
“Just now. I saw what he did.”
“You didn’t see shit!” He tossed the lighter aside, and it hit the wall before dropping to the floor. “You’re just trying to stall, hoping to buy time so your knight in shining armor will rush in.” He laughed. “I’ve got news for you. He’s not coming. I made sure of that.”
My body went numb. “What did you do to Aidan?”
“Nothing you need to worry about. By the time they find him, this pretty little head of yours will be hanging.” He yanked my head back by the hair.
I sobbed, overwhelmed with grief at the thought of him hurting Aidan. “Why are you doing this? What do you have against him?” The rope tightened around my throat. “Please—”
